Caf-fanatic
August 12, 2008 · Print This Article
A person can develop a deeply personal relationship with their addictions. I’m talking legal addictions here. The over the counter kind that truthfully are just as unhealthy or detrimental to our lives if they were outlawed. There are plenty of things in this world I can live without. Unfortunately, at this moment in my life caffeine does not appear to be one of them.
I haven’t always been a junkie, but I have always been an insomniac. Sleep is known as a necessary evil around these parts and over the years I had to find ways to accommodate my hectic schedules to remain functional. In college I had it made. I worked the night shift while at school, succumbing to the insomnia and getting my homework done at the same time. It was then I started with Vivarin, caffeine pills they handed out in our welcome bags each new semester (nice modeling). I once took an exam after an all-nighter and 4 Vivarin on an empty stomach and thought I was going to die a shaky legged death. I’ve been building up my tolerance ever since.
Ten years later, I have no choice but to admit to my addiction. I once watched a documentary about recovering alcoholics and how they cope with their healing. One man redesigned his driving pattern to avoid passing any liquor stores to avoid temptation. I can relate. If I pass a Starbucks…you best believe I’m stopping, even if I have a ½ full coffee in the cup holder. My regular order, even in the winter, is a large iced coffee with a shot of espresso; knowing they make the shots 2 at a time and hoping they offer me the 2nd shot for free. Sometimes, most of the time, I order 2 so I have one to drink on the way home, and the chaser to savor later before bedtime. A night cap if you will.
My coffee addiction is supplemented by my Energy Drink Addiction. Nowadays I can wake up, chug 2 Red Bulls as if they are a palate cleanser and still long for an early nap. This isn’t good. I somehow have talked myself into the idea that Sugar Free Energy Drink is GOOD for me! It’s not just caffeine, I say. It has B vitamins and Niacin! Niacin, (what the hell is Niacin?) never hurt anybody! I’ll buy it by the case. At some point, my body has got to feel the effects of this caffeine overload. Can you say ‘stomach ulcer’?
I imagine that the boozy homeless man, who forages through my recycling bin for returns, sees my pile of sugar free energy drink cans and old plastic coffee cups and says to himself, “and they think I have a problem!” I’ve tried to cut down, lessen my intake; switch evils. I had a great month on Green Tea and water, but it still doesn’t appease my need for the hard stuff.
I’m not a choc-o-holic. I don’t NEED pasta. I can stop at just one potato chip. T.V. for me has pretty much become background noise. Drinks are for Friday nights and friends, but caffeine…I indulge every day, and I don’t know how or why I should stop. Nor am I prepared for the headaches, body aches and overall displeasure that accompany denying me my lifeblood. Until I figure it out, I will be first in line crossing my fingers for that free extra shot of espresso.
Please give a warm welcome to our brand spanking new writer, Meghan! I think you all know her, yes? She was kind enough to step in while Karri had to be away, dealing with a family emergency. So give the new girl some loves…in the form of comments and accolades.
On 08/12/08 at 1:18 am
Carol said:
Yay for coffee! I’m up at an inhumane hour, so perhaps I shall go brew a pot.
I’ve done well minimizing my coffee, but I am addicted to iced tea. That being said, I feel better and certainly sleep better when I ONLY allow myself water for three days. It’s time to go that route, again!
On 08/12/08 at 7:35 am
Meghan said:
While you brew a pot, can you make it a double.
Iced tea, that’s like water, right?
On 08/12/08 at 3:43 am
kiki said:
I can totally relate. If I don’t have at the very least a large, strong coffee before 10am not only am I completely disfunctional for the rest of the day, but I’m a complete bitch too!!! Not good in my line of work. And now I can drive I actually leave for work 20 mins early so I can swing by my own place of worship. God Bless Starbucks drive-thru.
Great article Meghan
On 08/12/08 at 7:36 am
Meghan said:
I will, sadly, drive out of my way for coffee…What? It’s important!
On 08/12/08 at 10:28 am
Trista said:
All my friends and family know better than to try and speak to me before coffee…even my 4 year old and six year old. I got it baaaaad.
On 08/12/08 at 11:49 am
Meghan said:
The 2.5 yr old Bean I work with has been known to say:
“Meghan is a FAAANNNN of the coffee!”
She came up with that on her own!
On 08/12/08 at 12:23 pm
Trista said:
I really wanna meet that kid…she sounds like my kind of girl!
On 08/12/08 at 5:22 am
Sarahh said:
Meghan, um I am going to need you to crawl out of my mind.
Double tall mocha latte. This is my 2 shots in the small tall cup of energy-tastic starbucks. Yummm…. OR if I am feeling less than jittery it is triple grande..
I did finally give up the tall (not 40oz) sugarfree redbulls. I went on a diet, and gave up just about everything.
Everything except my double tall mocha.
I gave up a 14 year pack a day menthol ciggie habit, but can’t leave the warm goodness of my espresso shot…
Love this!!!
On 08/12/08 at 7:38 am
Meghan said:
The tall Sugar Free Red Bull is a beautiful thing!
I’ve been known to get a Black and Blue…large iced with 3 shots.
When they see me coming the Barista gets awfully busy…
On 08/12/08 at 5:36 am
Chris said:
I tend to stick with Dew, since it’s so difficult to find Jolt (or, better yet, Mega Jolt), and my buddy is hooked on Rockstar.
On 08/12/08 at 7:39 am
Meghan said:
Holy Crap…they still make Jolt!! I thought that was an 80’s drink…I havent seen it in years!
On 08/12/08 at 6:36 am
Rex said:
So that’s why the woman’s insane…
On 08/12/08 at 7:40 am
Meghan said:
You should see me when I am off coffee…that’s when the insanity kicks in.
Come on, really?
On 08/12/08 at 9:17 am
Rex said:
How about NO? haha I can see you being the fidgety person in the yoga class…
On 08/12/08 at 9:20 am
Meghan said:
I tried going to Yoga last week. But it is next to a Starbucks…and well…
On 08/12/08 at 6:53 am
Prophet said:
You’re going to have to prove this bit about eating just on e potato chip and astopping…I’ve never seen it done…we’re talkin’ two chip minimum at best…I’d stake the future of my reproductive rights on it.
On 08/12/08 at 7:18 am
Jime said:
Hell, I just stack two or three chips together and eat them at once. More is better than less, right? Pass the bacon!
On 08/12/08 at 7:42 am
Meghan said:
And I don’t like bacon…REALLY!
On 08/12/08 at 7:53 am
Jime said:
What was that? I couldn’t understand what you wrote. It’s like you’re suddenly writing in a foreign language.
On 08/12/08 at 8:00 am
Meghan said:
Seriously! Bacon and sausage…not for me. I’ve never liked it.
I stumbled on a man who made, like a woven bacon square as a treat for guests when he cooked for them, and I gagged a little.
On 08/12/08 at 8:14 am
Trista said:
Mmmm…bacon baskets!
On 08/12/08 at 8:16 am
Meghan said:
Thats what it was! A bacon basket! I have to go find the picture now!!!
On 08/12/08 at 8:39 am
Jime said:
Mmm I wanna bacon basket. Anything wrapped in bacon is good. This works especially well with healthy foods like vegetables. Bacon cookies are also good. Cupcakes with bacon are acceptable, I think there’s a new word for those…cupcacons.
On 08/12/08 at 8:42 am
Meghan said:
I’m the only one who doesn’t like bacon!? Maybe I haven’t had GOOD bacon, but all I’ve tried just tastes like I am licking a greasy skillet.
Licking a greasy skillet with my big fat tongue! Ewww!
On 08/12/08 at 8:57 am
Jime said:
No, you’re doing it right. Back when I was a kid we used to fight for who got to lick the greasy pan first. Me, me!
Kidding.
On 08/12/08 at 9:55 am
Meghan said:
I’m gonna stick with licking the cake batter spoon!
On 08/12/08 at 7:42 am
Meghan said:
I typically avoid the 1st chip…the second is kind of an overload. I’ll meet your challenge.
I’m not afraid of you, Prophet!
I kinda am…
On 08/12/08 at 7:23 am
Cassie said:
I used to HATE coffee and was never much of a caffeine fiend, but here lately, I dare say I’d rival your intake!! Except my vice is Rockstar…the purple can, with Guava….and TONS of them!!!
I blame my ex-job and having to fake-awake too often!!!! LOL
On 08/12/08 at 7:44 am
Meghan said:
See, I never used to drink it before…before meaning 1996.
I just can’t do without it. Even if I have one of those Sundays where you just don’t want to leave the house…I’m going out for a double dose of caffeine!
On 08/12/08 at 7:31 am
Jime said:
I don’t drink coffee or use any caffeine products of any kind. Sometimes I feel like I’m not living up to my human requirements for mass consumption.
Apparently I am odd.
On 08/12/08 at 7:48 am
Meghan said:
No, not odd, my dear! Pure…
I have plenty of addict free friends who watch me chug an energy drink and wait for me to climb the walls.
There must be something you do wrong Jime! Chew gum? Walk on the left side of the sidewalk?
On 08/12/08 at 7:51 am
Jime said:
Occasionally I whistle. I stop when I notice people holding their ears shut. Also I’m a clumsy juggler.
On 08/12/08 at 8:02 am
Meghan said:
sigh…
I can’t whistle. I try, nothing comes out.
Here comes an awkward EVE whistling lesson involving the words suck and blow.
On 08/12/08 at 8:15 am
Trista said:
And don’t forget to use your tongue…
On 08/12/08 at 8:23 am
Meghan said:
I think my tongue is too big!
Yeah, I said it, I have a huge tongue.
On 08/12/08 at 8:49 am
Jime said:
Is it too thick or too long?
On 08/12/08 at 8:54 am
Meghan said:
It’s long and thick. OMG!
I’m laying down! Over here bus!!
On 08/12/08 at 9:18 am
Rex said:
I don’t believe you. PHOTOGRAPHIC VERIFICATION IS REQUIRED.
On 08/12/08 at 9:23 am
Meghan said:
Trust me. You haven’t seen a room come to a halt until one of my friends says too loud ‘OMG show them your tongue trick!’.
The record skips off the turntable, lights come up, crickets chirp…
On 08/12/08 at 1:10 pm
Prophet said:
Are we talking girthy like a cow…or long like an ant -eater’s? IF it’s the former…I will forver refer to you as Meg- Megs the sow tongued. IF it’s the latter …I guess calling you Meghan will have to suffice
On 08/12/08 at 1:18 pm
Meghan said:
I have, what’s been coined by a guy friend years ago,
Camel Tongue.
It’s not THAT bad…but I can flex it in funny ways.
I am now mentally skimming through the list of friends I asked to come read this post….
On 08/12/08 at 1:19 pm
Trista said:
Ummmm, Prophet? A sow is a pig…and I will thank you not to talk to our new writer like that.
On 08/12/08 at 5:29 pm
Prophet said:
my apologies…pig… cow, aint no harm in it iffen you’re farmin’ it.
On 08/12/08 at 9:35 am
Meghan said:
This Just In:
Gaudiya Vaishnava Hindus abstain from caffeine…it over stimulates the senses.
In fact to be initiated under a guru, one must have had no caffeine (along with alcohol, nicotine and other drugs) for at least a year.
Guess what Religion I won’t be signing up for (as if they’d have me!).
On 08/12/08 at 9:47 am
Fiona said:
Wow, and to think I’ll happily forego my cup of joe in the morning.
For me it’s snacks. If I’m at work or reading I must have a snack. I’m not hungry, I’m not bored, but for some reason I mus be chewing something. Gah. Maybe I should take back up smoking.
On 08/12/08 at 9:51 am
Meghan said:
Mmmm snacks! I’m really bad with cashews, peanuts. That little tin is a serving size? Right?
Ohhh, and Paul Newman makes these Ginger Cream cookies that are like Oreos, but the cookie part is a Ginger Snap!
I’m hungry!
On 08/12/08 at 9:49 am
Karl Rove said:
Yep, I admit it. I’ve never had coffee and I don’t see myself drinking it any time soon. I love the smell of it, but I’ve managed to avoid drinking it somehow. And I rarely drink soda and have never tried energy drinks. So I guess I’m just not that big on caffeine, even though I have insomnia too.
On 08/12/08 at 9:53 am
Meghan said:
I never liked the taste when I was younger! Now I can pick out a Kenyan blend blindfolded.
I can do without soda, I don’t like the caramel taste. And for the record I do drinks tons of water.
On 08/12/08 at 1:59 pm
Karl Rove said:
I prefer Iced Tea (my favorite being an Arnold Palmer).
On 08/12/08 at 3:24 pm
Meghan said:
He has me sold on the bottle alone…I am such a sucker for packaging!
On 08/12/08 at 10:01 am
Trunks Kirshner said:
Great writing Meghan!! I know that during the last academic semester I had ended up resorting to adderall when Rockstars and Super Sized Red Bulls weren’t enough to help me pull an all-nighter in the research office.
.
I’ve had more coffee this year than the first 20 years of my life combined - more vivarin - more rockstars and red bulls - and tried adderall
.
what was my reward for this? 3 A’s / 9 B’s / 1 C
.
why did I make a C you ask? Cause I was sleeping for two straight days and missed an exam after being awake for 60+ hours
On 08/12/08 at 10:11 am
Meghan said:
Not a bad report card!
Have ya seen that gargantuan can of Red Bull they make now!??!?! It doesn’t come in Sugar Free, so I haven’t tried it. But boy does it look tasty!
I can’t believe they gave us Vivarin in college! Right in our welcome kits.
On 08/12/08 at 10:15 am
Trunks Kirshner said:
I didn’t discover all the energy pills until last semester, which was the hardest semester on my psychology track.
.
I’m probably going to buy that mega-red bull when I start playing the new Madden Football on PS3! I’m going to play all night lol
On 08/12/08 at 10:21 am
Meghan said:
I played Mario on my Nintendo 64 in college!! I’m old!
On 08/12/08 at 10:38 am
Trunks Kirshner said:
and I was playing Final Fantasy 7 on playstation in middle school lol
.
video games were my “gateway-addictions”
On 08/12/08 at 10:52 am
Meghan said:
I was never good at those games! Or racing games, I need jolly bouncy characters and princesses.
Although, I did rock Metroid in the 80’s. That is some old school ‘p-shoo p-shoo’ noises right there.
On 08/12/08 at 10:08 am
kiki said:
LOL. I got a large iced coffee with an extra shot (and my signature addition of hazelnut syrup) just to see what all the fuss is about.
Well. I can’t stop laughing. The shakes are kinda distracting. I’d like to be in Hawaii right now. And I mustn’t forget the laundry detergent next time I go by hannafords. And my brain is fizzing. My boss asked me if I’ve been drinking. And I couldn’t stop laughing. I’m NOT allowed to drive home til its worn off. And did I mention my brain is fizzing??!!
Seriously meghan I don’t know how you do it. If I had 2 redbulls on top of this I’d be needing defib on a gurney.
Gurney. Now there’s a funny word. LOL.
On 08/12/08 at 10:14 am
Meghan said:
Kiki! Go take a cold shower! You’re freaking me out!
Think of the children.
This post isn’t helping my addiction mind you. I hit the Starbucks on Mem. Drive first thing this morning and I’m thinking of going back.
On 08/12/08 at 10:23 am
kiki said:
I already had three cold showers (car to store to car to cottage) this morning as its pissing it down and 62 degrees. So now I’m sneezing and jittery. Its a good look.
The children went out for brekkie with ma and pa so I didn’t start til 11. Plenty of time for the evil stuff to enter my bloodstream and wreak havoc. From now on I’m going to stick to my usual, safe and boring, normal iced coffee. I will, however, be putting 911 on speed dial whenever we hangout from now on!!!!
On 08/12/08 at 10:48 am
Meghan said:
‘its pissing it down’…lol. The Brits are so eloquent!
Coffee? Evil? LIES!
On 08/12/08 at 10:57 am
kiki said:
Lol at my eloquence. Is that what you call it? Ha.
And yes coffee is evil. As are Swedish redfish. And maltesers. And all other things that a lack of can make life seem so tough. That was an appallingly grammatically incorrect sentence but I can’t be bothered to change it.
(and yes I am waiting with baited breath for the chorus of terrible British accent imitations of I can’t be bothered…)
On 08/12/08 at 11:52 am
Meghan said:
Like I haven’t been saying it to myself all morning!
That and “David couldn’t start a piss up brewery!”
I heart that one!!!
On 08/12/08 at 12:50 pm
kiki said:
its “David couldn’t organize a pissup in a brewery”
And I’m flattered you quote me (even if its badly)
LOL.
On 08/12/08 at 3:27 pm
Meghan said:
Friday I shall walk down to the Off License straight away, being careful not to slip on the rubbish on the pavement and go ass over tit onto my bloody head!
On 08/12/08 at 7:09 pm
Kiki said:
Ok that was pretty good LOL
On 08/12/08 at 10:09 am
Trunks Kirshner said:
On July 1st I ended a friendship with one of the greatest friends I ever had and ended up drinking everyday in July and 3 days into August
.
So I had alcohol for 34 straight days - it was very therapeutic - and though it was my most negative outlet of emotion, it was helpful nontheless. Playing basketball and exercising was also helpful
On 08/12/08 at 10:19 am
Meghan said:
Yikes…sorry to hear about the loss.
Someone else told me to exercise more as part of a caffeine breaking regimen. Lemon juice in water, green tea, more fiber, blah!
When I go shopping I feel very virtuous about the whole body cleanse. Then I get home and eat anything covered in cheese.
On 08/12/08 at 10:30 am
Trunks Kirshner said:
I also heard that eating breakfast gives you more energy - which I didn’t do at all during the 07-08 school year. So I tried doing the whole breakfast thing this summer and ended up saving a lot of money on energy drinks in the afternoon, and actually lost weight
.
It’s weird - I don’t understand why breakfast is so significant but it seems to be a positive thing
On 08/12/08 at 10:45 am
Meghan said:
What? Coffee isn’t breakfast? I need to look into this.
On 08/12/08 at 11:03 am
kiki said:
Coffee most certainly IS breakfast. It comes from a bean (so is one serving of the daily recommended beans and pulses) and is made with water (which we are supposed to drink more of) and has milk (or in my case half and half) in it ( a serving of dairy) and hazelnut syrup (a carb)
That, in my book, is a very healthy breakfast.
And if you want to make it even more nutritious, add some fruit: a blueberry muffin is perfect.
Yum!