Dirty Thoughts

I vacuum and dust, change the bedding and do the laundry, and he cleans the bathrooms.

He was very domestic when we met, so he is used to doing the “dirty” work

I do know of some couples who share. Vic and I have worked out a system over time, but I still hear from women, that there is just an unbalanced distribution of chores. Not all, but more than 2. Hahhahaha…

Was this automatic or was it something you guys had to work out?

Intersting reading. Sadly I don’t think many men have moved with the times (putting a flame suit on in case). Most households now have both partners working full day. Yes the chores should be shared, along with other details like childcare.

Our household is a little different. Both of us being male, sexism does not play a part. We share the chores, and are both well domesticated. My one bonus is my partner finds ironing therapeutic so while I can iron, and do when needed, he generally does it. I don’t expect him to do anything for my children. Anything he does in terms of there care is something done freely by him and is much appreciated

I tend to be the one making sure the loo is pretty and clean. We both do laundry and dishes. Who does them is decided by who purely by who is less busy and can at the moment.

So far we have not encountered an argument and it works for both of us. If things are really getting out of hand due to busy work schedules for both of us, we will hire a professional cleaning lady to assist on an ad hoc basis.

I grew up in a stereotypical mummy stays at home and runs the fort, while daddy goes to work (and also diddles the secretary, just to complete the cliché) so the only chore I ever saw my father do were cutting the grass and putting the rubbish bins out. My mum did everything else, and as time went on it was amazing what she could accomplish with a large glass of courvoisier in one hand at all times.

Now I’m all grown up I think any relationship is a partnership and as such both parties should contribute equally to their life together. That’s not to say all chores should be split exactly 50-50. Like Brian said above, each person should do enough that everything ticks over nicely. Yes there’ll be the odd row, but that’s what makeup sex is there for.

Love It!

I am a Virgo…now I don’t know how much belief I put into my Astrological Sign, but I once met a man who asked me where I was placed in the stars. When I answered ‘Virgo.’ He said: ‘Me too…Want to Scrub some pots together?!?’

He had my number! I LIKE cleaning, domestic chores, painting a room - all that. The instant gratification for me is somewhat disturbing. That being said, I usually dive right into the yellow plastic gloves as a form of relaxing.

*cough*Pathetic*cough*

I will say in my last long relationship, my man was the domestic god to my goddess, doing a lot of the work. I wonder if it mattered he was a Virgo also?

Ugh! I soooo hate cleaning. It’s one of those necessary evils. And since I don’t have a partner at the moment and I can’t get the cats to change their own litter boxes, it’s a moot point for me at the moment.

That being said, I think it should be shared. If there’s something your partner hates, make her life a little easier and offer to do that chore…and vice versa. Seems to me that’s the key to happy cohabitation. *shrugs*

I generally don’t mind cleaning my apartment, but my enthusiasm for my bedroom comes in fits and spurts. So I’ll go three weeks of living in a hovel then one morning wake up, don the marigolds and get to it. It’s more satisfying seeing the results that way. If I kept it tidy all the time it would be a miracle. It’s never really dirty, just I end up with piles of random stuff collecting on every surface including the floor until I put it all away.

I had an ex who would clean all the time (Virgo too funnily enough), I’d be drinking a cup of coffee and before I’d have a chance to chug the last inch he’d have swept in, grabbed the cup, washed it and put it back in the cupboard. I’d be sat there mouth agape. Used to drive me INSANE (and not in the good toe curling way). But our room would always be tidy and he’d IRON the pillowcases. That was a nice feeling, freshly ironed pillowcases. I decided enough was enough when he asked did I want him to iron my undies as well as his own. Now that’s just weird. Who irons underwear???

What is this help you speak of? Have I hibernated through the “men mow the yard and nothing else” status quo?

Holy Shit. I’ve been doing it all (and then some) for five years, on my own. If I EVER (very unlikely) live with another man, I fully expect we would share the chores. I cook, he washes…or vice versa. I iron naked, he irons naked. He does the grocery shopping and I go down on him….I do the grocery shopping and he does the same for me…You get the idea.

Probably explains why I am still single.

Does being on this site make me grow a vagina?

In my case, I do ALL the cooking plus the heavy lifting (sweeping & mopping) and tech stuff (changing bulbs & batteries), etc. But I’m pretty domestic.

I have friends who do almost nothing! And I say almost because they take out the trash.

Most men AND WOMEN will do as little as possible IF they’re allowed to get away with it.

Consideration + Shared Responsibility =

I just have my cabana boy, Eduardo, do it all!!! hahahahahah

but, in all honesty…I’m pretty much it at my house…I mow, cook, clean, iron(sparingly), become an all around handyman!! LOL

I’m not domesticated with anyone per say, but I live with my parents. So, my situation is that of being able to share their roof and feeling I should pay back for my rent free living space.
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My parents both work and pay for our humble abode. I go to school, take of my children (with my parents occasionally stopping to complain from time to time), I do all the shopping, and most of the cooking (except when I’m tired and I tell everyone to make a sandwich).
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This situation will sooooo change if mom ends up losing her job and I’m forced to go to work (it’s a possibility).
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I think this and so many other situations is why I’m afraid of living with anyone ever again. I had a man who I was talking to, try and impress me with this talks of his house on grand lake. He poo pooed my thoughts of an education and a career. He said I could live with him and not have to work. Inexplicably I had a vision of me in hair rollers, house coat, and fuzzy flip flops leaning over a wash bin scrubbing out the mans boxer shorts. It terrified me to the core. I lost that man’s number.
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My ex and I had an arrangement that he works and I clean house and I did clean house, but he wanted it stark clean. Bare bones. He said I was good at putting some order to the chaos, but that it was still chaos. Well, actually he wasn’t that smart. He said I was good at putting all the mags and catalogs in a neat little pile, while according to him I should’ve thrown them all away.
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We went back and forth on the house. He’d try and tell me how I was supposed to do it and of course I wouldn’t. He may of worked (with bouts of scary unemployment here and there), but he rarely took care of the manly things around the house. He barely mowed, I can remember being five months pregnant and mowing our lawn that was knee high. He didn’t fix up anything around the house and he didn’t take care of our cars. If I’m supposed to do all the cleaning, then why couldn’t he take care of the manly around the house stuff??
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I’m just about convinced that I’ll probably never end up domestic with anyone again.

I never seem to realize something is a sore topic till I read about it on Eve-Fucking-101. Guess you ladies know how to get me all riled up. Well done, says I!

I agree with the comments above about sharing the responsibilities. In the past it has worked for me to use a list in order to keep track of things. The downside for me is that I am a very clean person and so I tend to do chores naturally and often, but once I start cleaning something, my girlfriends will see it as a rule that I will ALWAYS clean that thing. As if by taking the initiative to do it once I’ve signed some macabre blood-oath to do it for all eternity.

You know, I could go on and on about this topic but I’m going to cut it short and say this: I don’t mind doing all the chores. On my own I’d do them all anyway. What I mind is the lack of respect. Comments like, “Well, I could just get a maid to do menial stuff like that.” Or the haranguing if I’ve just been too busy to get around to do something just yet because I’ve been busy with another thing.

If your man does all the work, a “fuck you, do it faster” is probably not the right way to reward that. Instead, a thank you and a blowjob will do. Says I.