Mommy Needs New Toys!!!
August 31, 2008 · Print This Article
Two months ago, I planned to treat myself to some new personal goodies after my house closed. It was my self-inflicted promise to be good to myself. Despite the fact I enjoy being the nurturing giver I am at my core, I often fall short in giving myself what I need or desire. Quite frankly, someone or something else is invariably more important on my priority list. Any woman knows this dilemma, especially those of us who are mothers or serve as a caregiver to others in any capacity.
Every now and again, we have to step back and realize we own all of our actions. We own our lack of action, as well. From time to time, we must put ourselves first. It is a fine line, yes? The line between self-preservation and being purely selfish.
As my life tends to work, my kiddos inadvertently reminded me of that very promise last week. We were talking of buying my little girl her own Pink Nintendo DS for her impending Sixth Birthday. I don’t know exactly how the conversation turned, but the gist was “Mommy, you never buy yourself any toys!”
Well, then, let’s just be sure to fix that problem! After all, I did make myself the promise. I had visions of orgasmic goodness during Orgasmathon ‘08. I recanted the story of how the only toy I have bought myself in recent years was a small *cough* massager intended to be used for sore shoulders. It is small, battery-operated and has three nubby prongs on it. Let’s just say it can do wonders with AAA batteries! The only sexually-related toys I ever owned were purchased more than a decade ago by my now ex-husband. They have long since lost their vibrating goodness, too.
I will be the first to admit that I needed these past five years to come full circle with my own views and needs. There seemed to be a Scarlet “V” associated with masturbatory pleasures when coupled with anything silicone, plastic or glass. While I would agree that men tend to fear what they do not understand, I think women are just as guilty of it. In particular, I was guilty of it.
Why should I care what anyone thinks at the adult store? We have a wonderful one here in Nashville. However, it is located in a part of town where I am liable to see anyone as I enter or exit. Maybe I’m too old fashioned in some ways, I don’t know. I just know I would much prefer to enter and exit there with a friend. I think it would be more fun. I know I would feel like a kid in a candy store. To me, it is oh-so-fun to share candy.
For this treat to myself, I shopped in the privacy of my own home. Let me just say that visiting www.tootimid.com was a big treat to myself. Pure. Utter. Joy.
It was also very confusing to know what to buy. I did feel like a kid in an online candy store! A grown-up kid with a Visa Check Card, absolutely zero will power and an insatiable appetite for the veritable cornucopia of options for my sexual table. Suffice it to say, I spent the equivalent of what I would spend taking friends for sushi and drinks. I also spent another $20 to have an ample supply of Duracells in two different sizes. Afterall, toys without batteries are not nearly as much fun. Thanks to my kiddos for teaching me that lesson, too. Be prepared!!!
Mommy has a present coming via the UPS man today. Despite the fact my UPS guy is hotter than a firecracker on the Fourth of July, he will not be personally delivering any of my explosions.
NoSiree, *giggle*, Bob. Mommy will be taking care of those all on her own.
To make myself feel truly at peace with my purchases, I did need to choose a place to store my own personal Toy Store. This is my new treasure and I must protect it from innocent eyes and others who may be not-so-innocent in my bedroom in the future. I looked at the top shelf of my closet and decided it was the perfect place. I took one of my linen-lined baskets and have determined that is where my orgasms, I mean toys, will reside.
Welcome to heaven!
Every mom should have a happy shelf. And this mom, I go “top shelf”, all the way! Mmmmmmm…margeritas and mahem. Maybe a play date, too!!!
What was your first visit like to an adult store? What was your favorite purchase? Where do you store your happy toys? Come on, I really want to know!
Pollsb.com created a poll especially for this post! Go over and give it a vote when you have a chance by clicking here!
On 08/31/08 at 2:10 am
Anne said:
Note the first: I actually need to find a new hiding place. Previously, they were safe and sound in the basket of my night stand. Now that I have a curious tot… They need to go higer up. Of course, putting an end to shared nap time in Mommy and Daddy’s bed has helped, too. Keep the wee ones separated and all is well.
The last toy I purchased was at a party about four years ago. The party was hosted by a co-workers friend. One would think it uncomfortable to not only purchase a toy in the presence of a co-worker; but ten times more so to then learn the in’s and out’s of her sex life. It really was a calm and cool experience. And that lil fucker is amazing! The toy for me and the husband for her.
I do need a new bullet, though. Thanks for the reminder.
On 08/31/08 at 2:17 am
Carol said:
So, is the amazing “lil fucker” your bullet?
I can’t imagine buying toys in front of past co workers. Well, maybe one or two. Okay, ten. But, the whole group? I don’t know!
Oh….I know the front page of the article is warped. Originally, the first pic was the cover pic, too. But, for some reason, it was covering the text. I swear I didn’t do anything different.
I strongly recommend the highest shelf in your closet. Something so innocuous that little P wouldnt have an interest in it. EVER!!!
On 08/31/08 at 2:46 am
Anne said:
Hehe! The “lil fucker” is a (approximately ’cause I’m not waking Snick while I measure it) nine inch, pink, rubbery vibrator with a happy rabbit and internal beads. The head rotates, too. It gets the job done.
I like bullets because I can still move about the house doing whatever cleaning needs to be done and still knock one (or three) out of the park. And my mom says I can’t multi-task!
I think it really depends on the co-worker. If it’s someone you feel you can relate to personally, it’s a lot easier. If you have a secret crush on her, it’s entertaining. If you’ve just completed a series of major life events and are open to everything new and amazing, it’s bound to happen.
And once you find out that someone is into anal…It’s hard to really be intimidated ever again.
On 08/31/08 at 6:37 am
Carol said:
These are just more reasons I love you, Anne!
“one you find out that someone is into anal, it’s hared to really be intimidated ever again”.
We may have the same “lil fucker”. Only I know mine is NOT nine inches.
On 08/31/08 at 6:01 am
Meghan said:
Yup…top o’ the linen closet! It never fails!
Good for you!
On 08/31/08 at 6:38 am
Carol said:
Top of master bedroom closets are pretty good, too!
On 08/31/08 at 6:22 am
Lisa said:
I too have visited tootimid.com. Lottsa, lottsa stuff there! So…. What did you buy??
And please tell me that is not really a picture of your closet- no one is that organized!
On 08/31/08 at 6:43 am
Carol said:
*gasp* It is one of my closets in my master bedroom. But, have no fear, I am not truly that organized. I want to be..strive to be (makes life easier with kids) but you should see my daughters room right now. I bought those shoeboxes five years ago because a place went out of business. I figured for $16, I could forever have SOME organization. Color, too. The white shelves are the $12 versions at Target. They go with me. So, my total closet organization was done for $40.
I bought all kinds of goodies. I am thinking of truly just putting it all out there and writing reviews. A pearl rabbit…a bullet…some stuff NOT to be shared right now…and my favorite, a wand that can be locked into three different positions that has a removable sleeve on it.
On 08/31/08 at 6:52 am
matt h said:
Might I suggest rechargable batteries?
Sounds like it might be worth the investment.
On 08/31/08 at 6:57 am
Carol said:
I own two sets of rechargable batteries…for my digital camera!
On 09/2/08 at 8:10 pm
creepy fucker said:
Now if only you’d start keeping that with the other stuff…
On 08/31/08 at 7:10 am
Meghan said:
Thanks for coming by, Sir! All my batteries are rechargeable, one of my own ‘adult’ purchases!
On 08/31/08 at 6:54 am
matt h said:
I am still computer dumb. Please remove my full name!!!!!
On 08/31/08 at 7:01 am
Carol said:
How cool is that…I fixed the issue! Woo hoo for learning something new today.
So, what about you, Mr. Matt? Any favorite toys for yourself or your partner?
On 08/31/08 at 7:42 am
matt said:
Ha-ha. No partner at this time.
Have had some great fun with toys, but find that the best toys are exploration and innovation.
Did have a “partner” want to make a mold of my “toy”.
Hey, just remembered, had a woman give me one of those little rings that go around the base of me, with two little vibrating beads in it. I did love that. Kept it. Wore it out.
On 08/31/08 at 9:02 am
Carol said:
Yay for cock rings!!! Gotta love a man who is willing to play!
On 08/31/08 at 8:27 am
Mike said:
Loved that story…I always thought it was us guys who were intimidated by the toys that did what we could not…learned about keeping the toys up the day we found our jar of “jelly” empty and our four year old daughter admitted it was yummy…
On 08/31/08 at 9:03 am
Carol said:
I had my daughter tell me something in my closet was making a noise. Talk about embarrassing! But eating the go-g0 juice? Oh my!
On 08/31/08 at 8:28 am
Karri said:
HA! I remember giggling like a school girl the first time I ventured inside the metropolis of all things sex, sexy and even a wee bit scary. My best friend and I pretended that we were there buying a gift for a friend. We went so far as to say things like, “I wonder what she’d like? Oh, this would be funny.” Silly girls! These days, I more closely resemble Norm at the local house of orgasmic wares…where everyone knows your name.
On 08/31/08 at 9:04 am
Carol said:
YOU are the one who educated me on some *ahem* things via long distance calls. I had such fun on line..but still want to venture into the local playhouse with a friend.
On 08/31/08 at 8:33 am
teri~michelle said:
AHAHAH I have to say Carol you cracked me up from beginning to end on this one. And only because I made that promise to myself too and this weekend is the weekend to make that promise come true. Mama is getting a “Top Shelf” happy toy box too! *laffin*
I’m not and never have been afraid to go into an adult store. Our closest one is about 10-20 mins down the road. So money, particularly gas money, has been playing a HUGE decision making part in when I get to make that trip.. *lol* they don’t have online that I’m aware of..hmmm maybe I’ll check that out. *lol*
You go girl..hope to see you smiling by a mile tomorrow!! *hahahaha*
mad-MAD-orgasmic-luv,
t~m
xoxo
On 08/31/08 at 9:05 am
Carol said:
oh my! Good to make you giggle, TM!
First..you try the beef and loved it. Now, off to the Adult Toystore!
Synchronicity, sister! Make your happy shelf. I hope yours makes you happier on the front end compared to mine. Oddly, the toys arrived with great anticipation, and I let myself down! Another article for another day.
On 08/31/08 at 10:13 am
teri~michelle said:
We are definitely in sync right now that’s for sure. *chuckles* It’s not this weekend for me though, it’ll be next weekend. I guess I’ll have to blog about that experience..*at the store…not afterwards!LoL*
Actually I know mine will make me happy..I’m buying replacements so I already know what to expect. *heh* and on the batteries..buy rechargeables..*lol* that way you are NEVER out of replacements…*ahahah*
love you woman!
xoxo
On 08/31/08 at 1:51 pm
Carol said:
Oh, do tell…if you won’t share here, send me an email! Let’s share the joy, shall we?
Love you, too. Thanks for being so supportive. Means more than you know to me.
On 08/31/08 at 8:51 am
lisaq said:
Oh the first visit was well, weird. Living in a small town, teaching at the local high school I almost felt as if I should be in disguise going in! Then, once in, I had no idea what the hell to buy! I soon realized this one little toy was NOT going to be sufficient.
These days I have an annual Toy Party on my birthday…my very own gift to myself! That way I kind of have a personal shopper and someone to recommend the best toys and accessories. It’s a win-win. Happy birthday to me!
Since my kids are grown and now gone, there are no worries about where the toys are kept. I have a basket conveniently in the beside table. There was that one incident when Mom decided to go find a muscle relaxant. Those meds are kept in the basket above the toy basket. Rather than waiting for me to get it for her, she decided to get it herself. Opps! That was a little awkward!
On 08/31/08 at 9:09 am
Carol said:
I would laugh so hard if one of my parents found my toys.
I think the idea of birthday presents being all sexual is kind of fun. But, then again, I’m finding that no toy takes the place of a warm, lingering kiss. The human touch.
So glad to see you today. I’m feeling a little bit alone!
On 08/31/08 at 9:06 am
~Lori~ said:
Thanx for the reminder, Xmas is coming soon, been thinking to revamp the ancient things from the ex ;p As for hiding places, I just used my nightstand, dumb me, teenager informed me now that she is grown, she snooped, got one more growing up, need to rethink storage area.
On a secondary note, have y’all seen this advertised? https://www.vibratingtouch.com/?cid=502100, a friend of mine in TX, was mad, she can’t buy it in the store, nor via the net. If you look there are few states that won’t allow it, including CO too. Befuddles me a little bit, plenty of strip bars in TX, only a few adult stores, in CO they are so open about all types of sexuality, just look at the ads in the paper! Yet there is some type of archaic law I guess that won’t allow them to order this product, I just don’t get it…
On 08/31/08 at 9:11 am
Carol said:
I will have to do some exploring!
My daughter will be six next week. I have a feeling her curious little mind will be on a wild hunt to find my goodies in years to come. I may have to invest in one of those closet safes that lock!!!
“oh, those are important papers, honey. ” Paper is not exciting. Plus, my investment in me would be fire proof!!
On 08/31/08 at 9:33 am
~Lori~ said:
Lol! I like the way you think woman!
On 08/31/08 at 1:52 pm
Carol said:
I like the way you think AND share!
On 08/31/08 at 10:21 am
Trista said:
Texas has laws against selling phallic sex toys for pleasure…the shops out there have to market things as “novelty” to even be able to sell them.
There was a story not too long ago about a woman giving pleasure parties getting arrested in Texas. I am moving to Texas within a year…so all this stuff concerns me greatly.
On 08/31/08 at 10:31 am
Meghan said:
You’ll just have to start an on-line registry!! Now that everyone else knows about the laws, you’ll have every reason to make gift requests from an itemized list.
On 08/31/08 at 1:52 pm
Carol said:
There is just something so very wrong with some states and their antiquated laws regarding sexual conduct!
On 08/31/08 at 9:34 am
Trista said:
<—— Loves shopping for sex toys. Online, in the stores, wherever. With my friends, with my man, by myself.
I heart sex toys. They really did change my (sex) life and I owe them eternal gratitude.
On 08/31/08 at 10:55 am
Meghan said:
I’ve looked at a toy before and gave it a verbal ‘Thanks! That was awesome!’
We don’t have a very good sex shop around here, or at least the one I know. There must be a better den of sin that I’m not privy to.
On 08/31/08 at 1:53 pm
Carol said:
I wish I could say the same! yes, they opened me up some…but for reasons which would be worthy of a separate article, mine are not doing the trick for me!
On 08/31/08 at 9:36 am
Meems said:
My first visit to the adult store to make a purchase to myself was in Feburary at the ripe ol age of 34. I got me the deluxe rabbitt that twist, turns, has the metal beads with a bunnyears anxious to please.
God bless that little bunny!
Love your stuff honey, makes me smile and giggle
Meems
On 08/31/08 at 11:00 am
Meghan said:
Hey Meems! Stepping in for Carol while she’s out for a few…buying sex toys perhaps? She didn’t say. Hmmm..
My first sex store was an accident! I had just moved to a new area, was driving around and thought it was a video store!! Apparently the blacked out windows didn’t tip me off. I walked in, felt like I had just been kicked in the stomach, made the shortest lap I could and walked out.
Lasted 15-20 seconds!
On 08/31/08 at 1:54 pm
Carol said:
Yeah for bunnies!! Rabbits, specifically. Thanks so much for coming by Meems. I was feeling so alone…you know where I had to run off this afternoon!
On 08/31/08 at 9:44 am
Meghan said:
I have another pleasure party invite coming up next month. It’ll be nice to see the new toys lined up nice and neat.
My 1st party a roommate set up for us to hold at our apartment. I didn’t know anything about the details. We’re setting up food at there’s a knock at the door. I answered and it was a woman, very grandmotherly - about 65, knit separates, pearls, died red hair and she was THE HOSTESS from the Pleasure Party Service!
Nobody else seemed to be embarrassed about her role as I was. I was 22, and somebody’s Nana was peddling rubber dicks in my living room.
On 08/31/08 at 1:56 pm
Carol said:
Nothing says “you need rubber dicks” like having someone’s grandmother hock ‘em to you!
Oh my…I would have been just slightly…ever-so-slightly….put out of even MY comfort zone.
On 09/2/08 at 8:13 pm
creepy fucker said:
“Nothing says “you need rubber dicks” like having someone’s grandmother hock ‘em to you!”
That needs to be on a t-shirt.
On 08/31/08 at 11:41 am
Karl Rove said:
Two weekend posts? And on Labor Day weekend? You all need to take some time off!
On 08/31/08 at 11:45 am
Meghan said:
What?! You didn’t get the announcement…we’re live 7 days! Who else is going to talk about Porn and Sex Toys while we celebrate our Nation’s Great Holiday.
Eve-101 is it’s own Parade!
On 08/31/08 at 1:56 pm
Carol said:
Every weekend going forward, too. You can’t say the Eve-101 family does not aim to please.
In more ways than one!
Always good to see you, Karl.
On 08/31/08 at 4:53 pm
Karl Rove said:
Well at least I’ll always have something to read on the weekends. Great work, as always.
On 08/31/08 at 4:56 pm
Meghan said:
Thanks Rove! You are one of our favorite customers!
On 08/31/08 at 5:25 pm
Carol said:
Thanks…I feel a bit left out in the cold today! I knew it would be slow with the holiday weekend, but THIS slow? Never.
On 08/31/08 at 5:29 pm
Meghan said:
Well, I’m home sick…
All those fun-yuns out on the beach getting wasted can kiss my derriere!
On 08/31/08 at 6:02 pm
Kiki said:
Precisely. I just drove home from the beach. I think - no I KNOW - I was the only sober one on the road!!!!
On 08/31/08 at 6:04 pm
Meghan said:
Me thinks I have strep again…throat killing me!
Thanks for stopping by K!
On 08/31/08 at 6:11 pm
Kiki said:
Oh yuck
on a holiday weekend too!!
I think it’s cos you work too hard and never stop for a rest, so your body forces you to. Take a nap, dammit, and do nothing tomorrow! And that’s Mama Kiki talking. So do as you’re told. Or else I’ll throw swedish fish at you (well I have to make room for my new toys LOLOL)
On 08/31/08 at 6:42 pm
Carol said:
Come on, K, you don’t want to waste a perfectly good Swedish fish!!! Poor girl doesn’t feel well, for sure. I love that you call yourself Mama Kiki. My momminess shows at some of the most awkward times!!!
On 08/31/08 at 9:29 pm
Karl Rove said:
Yeah. I mean, who can afford to travel right now anyway? I might indulge my inner redneck by going to the county fair tomorrow, but that’s about it.
On 08/31/08 at 12:16 pm
Vicki said:
I’m a big fan of Sugar and Spice parties myself…but I also have no shame in walking in or out of the sex shops. If you feel the need to go, I’d be happy to tag along!
I have a story regarding the storage of my accouterments. Remind me to tell you about the nearly cataclysmic combination of parents helping you move, a pretty bedside box filled with accessories, and catlike reflexes.
On 08/31/08 at 1:58 pm
Carol said:
Parents helping you move…I can just imagine! Then again, your folks seem fairly open minded and progressive. I am surprised your mom didn’t educate you a bit with what she surely has tucked away…
Thanks for last night. Had a blast with you and Josh.
And, yes, maybe you and I will venture over to Ellison…further down to the big Hollywood Hustler or whatever it is near 14th.
Sushi and Sex Toys…our next girls night out! LOL
On 08/31/08 at 12:40 pm
Lou P. said:
What a fascinating idea with the Orgasmathon. Women should definitely appreciate their capacity for multiple orgasms. For us guys, we want it… and then after it happens, it’s time to do something else (watch TV, sleep, whatever.)
It’s interesting to hear/read where women keep their toys. It has to be a challenge for women with children; make sure you pick a wise hiding place!
On 08/31/08 at 12:50 pm
Meghan said:
I’m still fascinated the lovely Karri and Trista made it through the Orgasmathon! They definitely gave their O their all!
It’s an amazing thing isn’t it! I have to tell you, sometimes I want it and then just want to curl up with my remote and watch reruns On Demand.
On 08/31/08 at 2:01 pm
Carol said:
Orgasmathon ‘08 was Karri and Trista’s *ahem* head to head competition for who could induce the most self-pleasure. If you read the link, you know that multiples after some point can actually make a girl sick!
My toy store is safely stored in the smaller of the two wicker baskets.Someday, perhaps it will migrate to the larger of the two!
A girl should have goals, right?
On 08/31/08 at 2:30 pm
Dillon said:
I always feel awkward in the adult “bookstores”, even when I went with one of my ex-girlfriends. It’s not that I think it’s wrong or something to be ashamed of… it’s just that there are some things in there that are way out of my realm of understanding… and I generally have to walk past them to get to what I’m looking for.
On 08/31/08 at 3:52 pm
Carol said:
*giggle* I can just imagine! In fact, I do believe you have just been the final encouragement for me to hit the adult store. Tell it like it is, from the “birds-eye”, first impression view.
You get “good boyfriend” points for going with her, Dillon. I actually know men who would not step foot into any adult store!
On 08/31/08 at 4:58 pm
Meghan said:
Dillon…shy…hmmm?
The first few times I went, I definitely felt like I had gotten spit out of a tornado when I left…but as long as you go with the intentions of having fun, it makes the whole trip worth while.
On 08/31/08 at 6:07 pm
Kiki said:
Like I said in a previous comment, the naughtiest thing I have in my bedside cabinet is 2 bags of Swedish fish. Disgraceful.
I have enjoyed a particularly rampant bunny before now, but was too embarrassed to pack it in my suitcase when I flew over here 2.5yrs ago and I’ve yet to get a new toy. TBH I haven’t needed to as I can do the job so to speak quite satisfactorily on my own. But, saying that, I did just look on tootimid.com and good Lord I must save some pocket money this month and go shopping!!!!
On 08/31/08 at 6:16 pm
Meghan said: