Shut Your Mouth!

We’ve all suffered from a good case of foot-in-mouth on occasion…it happens and hopefully without irreversible damage. But what are we to do when those we’re surrounded by are unaware of their verbal blunders? At every turn yet another confidant is attempting to remove a size 24 Shaquille O’Neal sneaker from their trap while we sit on the sidelines and watch the catastrophe unfold. I don’t get it…is it a brain to mouth malfunction that needs repairing? And if so, exactly who do we call for this service?

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ll be the first to admit that I have the ability to carry on a conversation with just about anyone or anything that’ll listen. I could yammer on and on to a tree for an hour and be just fine with it. Actually, once in a while I even prefer it. Nevertheless, there comes a time for each and every one of us when we should stop flapping our gums just for the sake of spewing saliva on the nearest unsuspecting passerby!

Somewhere in the midst of “change your ways or we’re not getting married,” (the last marriage - not the first) I discovered the goldmine that lies in the art of silence. I immediately coined it “The 24-Hour Rule” and it’s simple enough that a simian could do it. Pay attention and you can thank me later…

Next time you find yourself caught up in confusion, hurt, anger or just plain stupidity all you have to do is: SHUT. YOUR. MOUTH! Even better yet, shut-it for 24-hours. Stop the outbursts, name calling and irrational thought process long enough to call a time out. Imagine if you will, how trading your personal opinions, emotional baggage and propaganda for an insightful, intelligent and sane conversation is far more likely to suit everyone’s needs and actually garner a positive response. Not to mention the time and effort of banging your head against the proverbial wall is worth walking away long enough to gather your senses.

Thinking before we speak isn’t a novel concept, but certainly one that should hold credence. Our actions and reactions are often dictated by those we communicate with. When we forego rational for emotional we create a chain reaction. In the blink of an eye a snowball transforms into an avalanche, leaving a wave of destruction in its path that no search and rescue team can salvage.

If you aren’t certain if a woman is actually pregnant, for the love of gawd, don’t ask her when she’s due! When your beloved inadvertently makes a quip that cuts you to the core…don’t retaliate with a barrage of insults, but retreat and collect yourself instead. And lastly, don’t make a fool of yourself with a poor attempt at mimicking an accent…its just not good for foreign relations.

Be embarrassed for me…those examples up there were my slip-ups! What’re yours? Does your mouth have a mind of its own, or are you in control of your oral functions? Have you ever had a slip of the tongue that left you wishing for the power to be invisible, or do you battle it out till the bitter end? Misery loves company…share, won’t you?