Week in Review…and a bit of a preview too
May 9, 2008 · Print This Article
Karri and I had quite a week, kids, and since we are a family here at Eve we decided to share the experience with all of you. It all began with a long overdue reunion that was also serving as a see you later of sorts…(not goodbye, we don’t believe in goodbyes)
Best threesome…ever.
Will, Karri and I met up for a little lunch and a lotta cocktails at the local hot gay and lesbian spot, The Abbey, because, well, why not? Their food is good, their drinks are great and the view is fantastic.
Subtle, isn’t she?
We hung out, had a few too many alcoholic beverages and then Will and I scoped out women… (I’m thinking of going gay for the summer)
Will and Trista…lesbians?
…while Karri scoped out gay men (future husband hunting?). Fun and good times were had until I almost got into a bathroom brawl with a bull dyke and Karri narrowly escaped being accosted by an angry, ass-less old queen.
Realizing our behavior was getting a teensy bit out of hand, we headed over to Hamburger Haven across the way for some much needed sobering up. Mmmm…grease.
Number 3’s, American
And then it was time to say so long and send our Will out into the world…
As we stood on the corner of Santa Monica Blvd. and watched him walk away through our tearful eyes Karri’s phone began to chirp. That’s where our week went to shit.
Heart failure, and a car wreck, hospital trips and late night rescue missions, finals taken on very little sleep and major wardrobe malfunctions…needless to say we were somewhat distracted these past several days.
But you guys were here, every day, serving as our happy thoughts and our cheerful moments. You supported us and you distracted us…you gave back to your daily entertainers…
And we love you all so much for that.
So it is with regret that we must tell you that there will not be an Eve-101 show tonight. We both still have some personal things that need our undivided attention. But we promise to be back next week with our show on addictions, Eve style.
And we are also excited to announce that in honor of May being National Masturbation Month we are going to dedicate the week of May 18th to that very subject. And this dedication includes…
Orgasmathon 2008.
For those of you that are relatively new to me, I, Trista, was the solo competitor of Orgasmathon 2006. It’s a long story, one I will retell at the beginning of the week of the 18th, but lets just say that I ended up, ehm, competing, for over three hours straight and I experienced la petite mort 36 times.
But this time is going to be a little different…because Karri and I are going head to head, baby.
No, not like that! We will be competing against each other, but at our respective residences, ya pervs. And we will be taking pledges. Yes, pledges…so give it some thought, and cash in your piggy jars.
We will announce more details the week of the 18th.
So to all our you, our extended internet family, we send you love, and thanks and hopes for a great weekend. Get out there and enjoy life for us, would ya?
On 05/8/08 at 6:37 pm
Karri said:
If anything will pull us out of this turmoil its sure to be Orgasmathon ‘08!
I need to snatch one of those IV drips from the hospital to hydrate myself.
On 05/9/08 at 5:14 am
Trista said:
That’s cheating, Karri! No medical supplies in this competition!
On 05/9/08 at 6:07 am
Karri said:
You’ve already trained and participated in this event once before, I need a leg up.
On 05/9/08 at 6:18 am
El Supremo said:
Actually, I think both legs up will probably be more comfortable. I’m just sayin’.
On 05/9/08 at 6:29 am
Karri said:
Cripes! That set up was for my co-conspirator.
On 05/9/08 at 6:41 am
El Supremo said:
Even hung over, that was so easy it was so sad. If you’re going to hang them out there like that, I’m going to take a swing.
On 05/9/08 at 6:48 am
Karri said:
You’re hung over quite a bit, aren’t you? Is it time for an intervention? We are doing addictions next week, perhaps we can wrangle a professional for you to speak with.
On 05/9/08 at 6:52 am
El Supremo said:
Fuck that. I don’t need a 12 step program. Twelve PACK, program maybe, but fuck all that walking.
I’m not hung over that often. I just happened to have gone to a ball game last night with a bunch of friends, and it turned into a late night with a lot of beer and gambling on Wii bowling because basically we’ll gamble on anything.
On 05/9/08 at 7:06 am
Karri said:
Beer guzzling, adult men playing video games. WOW! I have no words. Please don’t mention this again before Orgasmathon ‘08 or I’m sure to lose!
On 05/9/08 at 7:24 am
Trista said:
knowing there are beer drinking video playing men in the world ruins your chances for an orgasm? I’d say you are in trouble!
On 05/9/08 at 8:34 am
El Supremo said:
Yeah, I’m gonna have to say that reality is going to intrude on her any minute now.
On 05/9/08 at 8:46 am
Karri said:
It’s certainly not the hottest fantasy I can conjure up!
On 05/9/08 at 10:54 am
Trista said:
Please…I INVENTED this competition.
On 05/9/08 at 6:18 am
El Supremo said:
Nice use of the word snatch.
On 05/9/08 at 6:30 am
Karri said:
Nice catch.
On 05/9/08 at 6:40 am
El Supremo said:
Nice snatch.
Thank you. Thank you. I’m here all week.
On 05/9/08 at 7:36 am
Carol said:
Is there a NOT-so-nice version of using the word snatch?
On 05/9/08 at 8:33 am
El Supremo said:
Slang term for vagina, cunt, twat, pussy, slot, slit, cooter, kitty, muff, beaver, poon, poontang, vajayjay, coochie, bearded clam, box, gash, honey pot, pink taco, hair pie, axe wound or sperm hole.
On 05/9/08 at 8:42 am
Carol said:
Leave it to you to take all the fun out the word for me now!
On 05/9/08 at 8:47 am
Karri said:
You never really know where the line is until you cross it.
OY!
On 05/9/08 at 10:30 am
El Supremo said:
Think of it as my weekend gift to you - your very own vagina-themed thesaurus for future use.
Y’all have a good weekend. I’m gonna go to Car Toys and get some stuff put in the new truck.
On 05/9/08 at 10:59 am
Kevin said:
You forgot hooha.
Oh… and um… temple. As in: I worship at the…
On 05/9/08 at 11:04 am
Trista said:
“Temple.”
This is why you, sir, are our super hero.
I will take temple over gash ANY day.
On 05/9/08 at 11:30 am
Jeff said:
I would have to agree there completely! Temple is where it’s at. I’m no superhero, thats cool with me though. I don’t need crazy superman sperm!
On 05/9/08 at 11:33 am
Trista said:
Nothing but grade A men here at Eve.
Well, ‘cept for that El Supremo character…
On 05/9/08 at 11:50 am
Kevin said:
I use “temple” a lot ’cause it DAMN sure is my religion. And I’ve always got a chuckle hearing “hooha”. Especially the way an ex used to say it… kinda like if little girls had a daytime game show… and when you won something, they’d yell out “HOOO ha!” LMAO. Trust me… so much funnier with sound.
On 05/9/08 at 3:26 am
Meghan said:
Very Funny, you ladies are the best! I had no idea May was Masturbation Month?! Maybe it was my Single Woman’s intuition, but I have been honoring the Holiday for 8 solid days now.
On 05/9/08 at 3:35 am
Carol said:
Me, too!!! *giggles* Karri and T going “head to head” will have imaginations reeling!
On 05/9/08 at 9:54 am
Chris said:
Dear Heart, my imagination has been wandering around that glade for quite some time, now!
On 05/9/08 at 11:10 am
Kevin said:
Yeah… I didn’t make it past that line. I’ve started the competition of my own event already.
On 05/9/08 at 12:29 pm
Chris said:
Oh… mental image begone, mental image begone, mental image begone…
On 05/9/08 at 12:40 pm
Kevin said:
Ha ha. Don’t click on my avatar, then. :p
On 05/9/08 at 1:15 pm
Trista said:
Rawr.
On 05/9/08 at 1:15 pm
Trista said:
<----- Doesn't follow directions.
On 05/9/08 at 10:22 pm
Kevin said:
^^^
Got what she deserved.
On 05/9/08 at 5:12 am
Trista said:
To tell you all the truth, every month is masturbation month for this girl! But it is a nice excuse to get the discussion of everyone’s favorite pastime going, isn’t it?
On 05/9/08 at 5:17 am
Carol said:
I think it’s the PERFECT excuse. Just to be clear, will this week include tips for carpel tunnel syndrome or include stories of ….ummm….self-pleasuring accidents?
On 05/9/08 at 5:36 am
Trista said:
Of course! And we are also going to have a materials and methods class complete with a photo documented field trip.
On 05/9/08 at 6:06 am
Karri said:
I was determined dammit!…hahaaaha!
On 05/9/08 at 7:08 am
Carol said:
I propose we all share our funniest “accident”…. mine was probably about the same time you,ummmm, hurt yourself. If I recall, we were both in pain and chose to make it all the moreso by laughing about it.
On 05/9/08 at 7:13 am
Karri said:
Ooooh! Good idea!
Whiplash via G-spot expedition is no laughing matter. And I still can’t find it…alone. GRRRRRR!!!
On 05/9/08 at 7:28 am
Trista said:
I have you all beat…I broke a bone!!
On 05/9/08 at 7:34 am
Carol said:
<—hurt her back. Seriously.
On 05/9/08 at 7:36 am
Karri said:
Oh my gawd! So you didn’t actually break up a dog fight, did you? I should have been suspect of that middle finger injury!
On 05/9/08 at 10:55 am
Trista said:
No! This time it really was a dog fight.
This time.
On 05/9/08 at 4:50 am
Sarahh said:
So what if I started Masturbation month early?? Oh well, there are worse things I am sure.
Enjoy your weekend, and Happy Mothers Day to all you moms. Go get a massage, a pedicure, enjoy your day.
Much love and Baaaaaa’s
Sarahh
On 05/9/08 at 5:13 am
Trista said:
Happy mother’s Day to you as well! Are you doing anything special?
On 05/9/08 at 7:29 am
Sarahh said:
Tee Ball and Mothers Day brunch with the Moms and the Grandmoms. Typical weekend…
You?
On 05/9/08 at 10:56 am
Trista said:
We are having a surprise get together for my Grandmother. Family coming in from all over the place.
But I still want a massage!
On 05/9/08 at 11:08 am
Chris said:
<== Volunteering
On 05/9/08 at 11:10 am
Trista said:
Are you…skilled?
On 05/9/08 at 11:16 am
Chris said:
Quite: Massage
On 05/9/08 at 11:53 am
Karri said:
UMMMMMMM…Ya, I can’t. One word: Svehn.
On 05/9/08 at 12:23 pm
Chris said:
The king of Denmark from about 987 to 1014? What does he have to do with massage?
.
Intentional Misunderstanding: Just one of the many services I offer.
On 05/9/08 at 12:34 pm
Karri said:
No, my Palm Springs spa weekend massage therapist. Enough said.
On 05/9/08 at 12:39 pm
Trista said:
Best.Massage.Story.Ever.
On 05/9/08 at 12:45 pm
Chris said:
Thank you. I thought you’d like that.
.
Fantasy Material: Another service I offer.
On 05/10/08 at 7:59 am
Kevin said:
I’m tired of hearing how GREAT a story is… or how LEGENDARY an adventure is….. and then NOT getting the gist! WTF?? Not even the Cliff’s Notes version? SPILL IT!
On 05/10/08 at 9:02 am
Karri said:
Ummmm…ya.
That one is far too embarrassing and cliff notes simply wouldn’t do it justice. It’s more of a “Confessions of single girl” episode.
On 05/10/08 at 11:45 am
Kevin said:
Well dammit… get on that will ya?? Or, I dunno… maybe write me a small essay on the subject and um… Oooh! I know! Send it with the book THAT YOU STILL HAVEN’T SENT!!!!
BOOOOOO!!!
On 05/11/08 at 2:29 pm
Karri said:
One post, three zings. I’ll send you a gold star too.
On 05/9/08 at 6:17 am
El Supremo said:
No fucking WAY is “the little death” an actual, real, no shit term for an orgasm.
Where’s the money going to go? How’s the betting going to go? I gotta say it… mine’s on Karri, simply because that hooker ain’t had a real one in her in, like… what… five years? Something like that?
On 05/9/08 at 6:41 am
Karri said:
Apparently you’ve never experienced multiple G-Spot orgasms. Master that and get back to me on “the little death.”
We’ll be donating a portion of our proceeds to a worthy non-profit. And if you’d like us to contribute to saving the wet lands stay tuned.
p.s
Days not years…I’m just sayin’
On 05/9/08 at 6:44 am
El Supremo said:
Do I look like I have a fucking G spot? Jackass.
A href=”http://www.ducks.org/conservation/initiative46.aspx”>Wetland for Tomorrow - North American Grasslands Initiative.
$250 saves an acre forever with a permanent conservation easement.
On 05/9/08 at 6:45 am
El Supremo said:
Fuck you, HTML.
On 05/9/08 at 7:01 am
Karri said:
An html challenged alcoholic…not pretty.
On 05/9/08 at 7:15 am
Carol said:
Karri linking ANYTHING to promote ass play…VERY confusing!!! **yet oddly entertaining…and educational**
On 05/9/08 at 7:21 am
Karri said:
I’m a hypocrite like that.
On 05/9/08 at 7:31 am
Carol said:
More tease, I do believe.
On 05/9/08 at 7:39 am
Karri said:
Lets be clear…my ass is off limits! His ass is fair game.
On 05/9/08 at 8:25 am
El Supremo said:
Who the hell are you kidding? You’ve got “I take it in the ass” written all over you, Karri.
On 05/9/08 at 8:48 am
Karri said:
WHAT?!
I will have you know that my “tramp stamp” clearly states “DO NOT ENTER!”
On 05/9/08 at 11:19 am
Trista said:
She’s dead serious. The direct translation from chinese to english is simply:
NO INPUT.
Right Karri?
On 05/9/08 at 11:54 am
Karri said:
It keeps me “happy and healthy” to have my ass remain cock free.